Hi Everyone!
Well here we are … Term 2 has come and almost gone, did you blink? It almost feels that way to me!!
How have you been? Is it just me or has this felt like the longest term ever? I think we all need to take a moment to pat ourselves on the back because we’ve made it!! We’ve got through and made it to the other side! It might feel like you need to take a breath, take stock and look back at how far we’ve all come! Our children have been incredible during this time … they have shown extreme resilience under quite unusual circumstances and we should all be very proud of how they have handled situations completely foreign to most! Having navigated these times with your children, you may feel that you have some great, foundational building blocks on which to build more resilience and more skills for next term and beyond.
The school holidays may bring some well deserved down time for you and your family (or it may be business as usual!) Either way, if you are able to take some time for each other, to regroup and evaluate where you are all at, to check in how you are all coping with your individual mental health and to work out how best to move forward successfully as a family unit, it will hold you in good stead to have a really wonderful Term 3 and beyond!
Strategies are so important for positive engagement, whether it be for your children in their school environment or other areas of their lives. If you can put in place various strategies for different situations that may occur it can be so valuable to empower your children (and yourself too!) You may find you never need to implement certain strategies or tools, but to have them in your figurative ‘Tool Box’ can be of great comfort and support!
Do you have trouble motivating your child to get to school? Is it a huge drama due to anxiety or a lack of confidence perhaps? If you can firstly work out what the challenge for your child is, then you can work towards finding great tools for them to use, so that ultimately, they can conquer the thing that causes anxiety or worry for them. If transitioning from home to school is the challenge, perhaps talking to them (pick your moment for a successful outcome, when they are relaxed, calm and not focused on something really important to them, will offer you the best conversation hopefully!) Often we underestimate our children with regard to problems they might be having … more often than not, in my experience, children can indeed tell you what the problem is and exactly how they are feeling about it, sometimes, given time and space to explore things, they can and will be able to offer their opinions as to how to solve the problem too. This may take more than one conversation, indeed it may be over the course of a period of time, but if you are able to provide them with a safe, non judgmental space to explore their feelings, you may well be pleasantly surprised as to the result of such conversations and opportunities!
In the instance of making coming to school a positive experience not only for your children, but for you also, it might be worth looking at your morning routine … in fact, I would suggest it necessary to go back further to the night before … do you have a night time routine in place? Is it calm and easy for children to navigate? Are your expectations as a parent/caregiver reasonable (and age appropriate) or are your routines and expectations too high in which case you may well set your child up to fail? To have positive conversations about what will happen when they wake up in the morning before hand so they know what to expect and what is expected of them might help. I know when I stay up too late and am not prepared for the morning (you might know how this goes … school clothes not ready for the morning, no bread or milk for breakfast, nothing to make lunches with, need to fill up with petrol in order to make it to school … you get the picture, yes?!) all these things can become huge stressors which make for a most challenging morning and that’s before you even get out of the house!! Imagine if you have a child with high anxiety and all this is frenetic activity is happening around them, it’s only going to make them more anxious or worried. Things happen and sometimes we can’t control everything around them or us, but being mindful starting the evening before, might make for a more peaceful start. Talking calmly about the day ahead, using positive, affirming statement and speaking calmly and gently whilst heading to school (may I suggest not having the news blaring whilst driving … I rarely hear enough good news to warrant listening to it as I prepare myself mentally for the day ahead!) Strategies like knowing where your child will meet their friends in the school yard, what lessons they will be having on that particular day, letting your child’s teacher know (email works well at the moment) if there are any challenges and collaborating as to how to best support your child particularly entering into class at the start of the day might benefit all (it’s great if you can let your child’s teacher know of any challenges at any given time, so they can monitor, support, encourage and care for your child during a time of stress is really helpful and worthwhile). Keeping lines of communication open with your child’s teacher, wellbeing staff and leadership if necessary, are really important ways you can help support your child whilst they are at school.
You might like to talk about the things you are going to do after you pick them up in the afternoon … it might be you can weave in a nice little surprise for you to do together, if you can make time in your schedule. Such a treat might keep them going during the day if things get tough! It doesn’t have to involve driving through those golden arches, it might be a walk along the beach or a quick play at a playground on the way home, it might be a playdate with a school friend or it could be something of their choice! It might help, particularly at the end of the week when enthusiasm might be waning, if you negotiate something fun to finish off the school week with you might well earn yourself many brownie points and have something positive to build on! A word of warning … if you do promise something, it is imperative to follow through as trust is such a very important thing in the scheme of things!
If you would like to speak to Kathy Baker or myself about ways in which we might be able to assist you with some positive strategies to help make school a really positive experience for both you and your family, please don’t hesitate to make contact. We are all in this together and together as a village, we can raise strong, independent, compassionate young leaders of the future!! The future is so bright … helping your children to shine their own special light and embrace the uniqueness that makes each one of them so special is such a privilege … they are so precious, each and every one of them has talents and gifts to share with the world … let’s be encouragers and nurturers always!
Have a most wonderful week … may it be filled with laughter and love and some fun thrown in for good measure! Take care of yourself and those you love and hold dear!
Karen Marks, Pastoral care worker.
